My first major hip injury was more than 30 years ago while water skiing, and I have been managing hip pain ever since. Two weeks ago, I had a state-of-the-art anterior total hip replacement. I couldn’t be more pleased or impressed with my surgeon, Juan Suarez MD, his team, Doctors Hospital Miami, and my rehab team at Polestar Miami. I want to share the emotional, behavioral, and spiritual journey preparing me for a total hip replacement.
I questioned whether I could still be whole after having a piece of my femur removed and replaced by bionic parts. Most who know me well know how much I love to shake my hips when the music starts. Based on my upbringing in South Sacramento and my frequent visits to Latin-American countries, I like to move my hips in all planes. The thought of not being able to express my groove because of residual hip pain weighed heavily on me. Every fiber of my body wanted to move to the beat, not to mention hike, travel, and run for charity. Unfortunately, my fear of pain started to outweigh the joy of dancing and movement.
Nearly 9 years ago I gave up pole-vaulting after an accident that resulted in a 4-level fusion and a lot of hardware in my neck. Here I am, 55 and unable to dance, run, or jump. Am I whole? I never imagined myself so young and cut off from basic human movement activities. Isn’t it our right to be able to move in any way we want? Moderate periods of depression were manifesting more frequently. I struggled with an emotional conflict between my desires to be anatomically whole vs being whole in my participation in life, able to move and express myself as an athlete and mover.
It was time to return to life; I chose the bionic hip option.
I am now looking forward to the ability to express myself through movement and play for years to come. That said, I did promise Lizette, my wife, and others in my close circles that I would not pole-vault again, but I never said anything about kitesurfing.
As many of you know, I teach how behavior can influence a successful rehabilitation. The literature teaches us that our perceptions and beliefs influence our reality even as high as an 80% correlation. Knowing about this powerful influencer, I spent months, if not years, preparing for a successful hip replacement by working on my belief of what it would be like. I had a very clear picture of bone on bone from my x-rays that could have been debilitating.
Nevertheless, I believed that I could have a positive outcome if I kept my tissues in their best possible shape through Myofascial Release and maintained the best possible range of motion through Pilates and Feldenkrais. It is hard for any of us to see anything different once we’ve seen a picture of a source of pain within our body.
I have been researching for years the best procedure, best surgeons, best anesthesia/pharmaceutical intervention (minimal narcotic), and pre and post-surgical protocols. I interviewed four top surgeons around the country and was looking for that spiritual and guttural confirmation of who would do the surgery.
As I sat with Dr. Suarez, I felt not only his experience and expertise were top notch, but I also felt his humility through a deep desire to learn and customize the procedure so that I would have the optimal experience. My heart and gut immediately confirmed that this was my doctor.
Even though each of the doctors I interviewed were leaders in their specialty, Juan Suarez, MD was going to be my surgeon. I share all of this because it was part of my journey to know that I had done everything possible to give me the greatest odds to walk out of that hospital with hope of returning to a more normal lifestyle. I believed that I was going to have a relatively pain-free procedure. I was going to be surrounded by my rehab team to support me for the two weeks post-op. Wendy Haskell, PT and Elizabeth Jimenez, LMT provided daily treatments assuring me that I had made a good decision and that restored movement was around the corner for me. I believed!
Hope is a spiritual attribute right up there with gratitude, compassion, love, and forgiveness. I realized that as I continued to decline in my physical activity levels, I was losing hope in my hip being able to do its job. At the same time, I learned lessons of gratitude for all that I have been given and compassion for all those around me who suffer more than me. I feel that the universe has taught me to be grateful for the abundance that I enjoy every day of my life, most importantly my relationships with my family, friends, and God. I have learned that even though pain can affect my ability to walk, run, and jump with ease, it only strengthened my compassion for my patients, clients, family, and humanity. What a great gift to experience the pre-surgical fear and anxiety that my patients experience including apprehension of the first step on a leg, when it seems like it doesn’t belongs to you, and my physical therapist says “time to go for your first walk.”
My first walk, truth be told, was not all roses. I had just had an injection of Tramadol, and I felt the buzz come over me. The therapist arrived and put the belt on me. “Be brave Brent,” were my thoughts. I stood up, to my surprise, with no pain. We took a couple of steps towards the bathroom, and I was feeling very lightheaded. By the time we got to the bathroom, I knew I was going down. I asked for someone to please grab the gait belt; I was going down. I guess no one heard me, or maybe I just imagined I said it, and I remember wedging myself between the toilet and sink and trying to minimize the damage. To my surprise, it wasn’t my therapists that caught me but my wife Lizette, and I came to, sitting on her knees, squished between the toilet and sink. I am so glad she was there, and I’m not sure where my therapists went, but I figured, things could only get better from here.
I had no pain in my hip and I was able to walk back to the bed with minimal assistance. AMAZING!
I was out of the hospital the next day. I felt a renewed hope. Was I really going to have a new hip that didn’t have pain? Well, two weeks after surgery, I am walking without assistive devices, going up and down stairs without holding on to the rail, and preparing to pole vault in the seniors’ competition (not really).
I am convinced that this journey over 30 years culminating with a new hip has improved the quality of my life physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I am eternally grateful for my family, friends, and brave patients who have supported me, physically helped me, spiritually fed me, and blazed a path for me to follow.
Follow along with Brent on Social Media @brentpolestar
